New Escentual Post: Scenting Kimye

Scenting Kimye

Scenting Kimye

As you may or may not know, I have a penchant for picking perfumes for hapless celebrities. There’s just something so satisfying about getting down to the nitty gritty of a celeb’s character and seeking out a fragrance that matches or compliments them. In my Scent a Celebrity Series I have perfumed; The Muppets, The Royals, The Disney Villains, Björk, Nicki Minaj and Lady Gaga, just to name a few. I simply love a good celebrity perfume match, it’s true.

For my Escentual column this week and in honour of their recent wedding, I have scented Kimye. That’s right, my scented picks have been plucked for the one and only Kanye West and Kim Kardashian. Think what you want about these two, but you cannot deny the power these two celebrities hold over the media and legions of gossip-lovers. So click here to read my wedding perfume picks for two of the most iconic (and not necessarily most important (although I do think Mr. West is very talented)) celebrities of our age.

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Scent a Celebrity Series: Poor, Unfortunate Smells – Scenting Disney Villains

Poor, Unfortunate Smells

Poor, Unfortunate Smells – Scenting Disney Villains

“The Scent a Celebrity Series is my vain attempt at picking perfumes for those who don’t know any better, yes I mean celebrities. Let’s face it, most celebrities are incapable of choosing decent clothing, boyfriends, girlfriends, movies, (insert-celebrity-mistake-here) let alone having the ability to make decisions about something as important as their scent – that’s where I come in. Never fear my dear schlebs, I will ensure that you are appropriately scented, all you need to do is listen.”

Like most people on this fine Earth, I love Disney. Yes, I accept that they give one false expectations of love, romance and the presence of talking tea cups, but I’ve found my Prince so all is forgiven. It’s not the Disney Princesses or Princes that interest me though, for all that is pleasant in life isn’t necessarily captivating. Instead I have found myself loving the devious, the dastardly and the down right depraved Disney Villains.

For this episode of the Scent a Celebrity Series I am assigning perfumes to my four all-time favourite Disney villains, ranging from the squid-y sashay of Ursula the Sea Witch to the campy hypnotism of Aladdin’s arch nemesis Jafar. So read on dear perfume lovers, but beware as these villainous perfumes may appear as cartoon follies at first however, deep down they are nothing but trouble.

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Scent a Celebrity Series: Scentcraft – Scenting the Witches of American Horror Story: Coven

Scentcraft

Scentcraft – Scenting the Witches of American Horror Story: Coven

“The Scent a Celebrity Series is my vain attempt at picking perfumes for those who don’t know any better, yes I mean celebrities. Let’s face it, most celebrities are incapable of choosing decent clothing, boyfriends, girlfriends, movies, (insert-celebrity-mistake-here) let alone having the ability to make decisions about something as important as their scent – that’s where I come in. Never fear my dear schlebs, I will ensure that you are appropriately scented, all you need to do is listen.”

Have you been watching American Horror Story: Coven? If you haven’t, or God forbid that you’ve not seen any seasons or episodes of this wonderful anthology series then shame on you! The premise is simple, each series tells a different story with the same ensemble cast playing a different set of characters. So far the show has killed a ton of people off in a murder house, shoved some unfortunate people in a properly dodgy asylum and most recently taken a deep insight into a coven of witches in New Orleans. Yes, it’s utterly brilliant.

Following a request on Twitter I have decided to scent four of the most fabulous witches of American Horror Story: Coven (i.e. Season 3). These characters and actresses represent the best of the show and range from the effortless glamour of Jessica Lange as one heck of a ruthless witch to the more than slightly unhinged but ever so fashion-forward supreme wannabe played by Frances Conroy. So sit back, read on and fall under the spell (or should that be ‘smell’?) of Scentcraft…

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Scent a Celebrity Series: Fragrant Femmes – Scenting Leading Ladies

Scenting Leading Ladies

Fragrant Femmes – Scenting Leading Ladies

“The Scent a Celebrity Series is my vain attempt at picking perfumes for those who don’t know any better, yes I mean celebrities. Let’s face it, most celebrities are incapable of choosing decent clothing, boyfriends, girlfriends, movies, (insert-celebrity-mistake-here) let alone having the ability to make decisions about something as important as their scent – that’s where I come in. Never fear my dear schlebs, I will ensure that you are appropriately scented, all you need to do is listen.”

This episode of my Scent a Celebrity Series serves as a slight change of tack from the norm. The series usually takes a famous person (ranging from Björk to The Muppets) and pairs them with a suitable fragrance (or fragrances) that perfectly capture the many facets of their personality. However, in this episode the focus has shifted beyond just humble celebrities to the characters they play.

Everyone loves a leading lady and a superb performance from a wonderful actress can turn a good movie into an extraordinary one. Here you’ll find a selection of some of my favourite actresses in one of their most impressive roles, and for good measure some perfumes that capture the spirit of their performances. These ‘Fragrant Femmes’ will have you glued to your seats and with a bit of luck the perfumes will too.

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Scent a Celebrity Series: ARTSNIFF – Scenting Lady Gaga

ARTSNIFF - Scenting Lady Gaga

ARTSNIFF – Scenting Lady Gaga

“The Scent a Celebrity Series is my vain attempt at picking perfumes for those who don’t know any better, yes I mean celebrities. Let’s face it, most celebrities are incapable of choosing decent clothing, boyfriends, girlfriends, movies, (insert-celebrity-mistake-here) let alone having the ability to make decisions about something as important as their scent – that’s where I come in. Never fear my dear schlebs, I will ensure that you are appropriately scented, all you need to do is listen.”

No celebrity needs more perfume assistance than Lady Gaga, especially after the massive disappointment that was her debut fragrance ‘Fame‘ and it’s safe to say that because of this her taste level perhaps isn’t where it should be. Fame’s crime wasn’t that it was a dreadful fragrance (general consensus was that it’s decidedly ‘meh’) but the fact that it was frightfully generic and captured only the pretentious element of Lady Gaga’s personality without any of the talent.

Love her or hate her it’s hard to deny that Lady Gaga is indeed talented. Yes, a lot of her ideas are derivative and she does have a tendency to bang on about how what she does is ‘art’ (her upcoming album is annoyingly entitled ‘ARTPOP’) but all-in-all she’s an exciting and provocative voice with a brand of pop that is satisfyingly addictive.

With this edition of the Scent a Celebrity Series, I have picked four perfumes that accurately capture the weird and wonderful persona of Lady Gaga – a woman who has sported fashions made from Muppets, beef and bubbles, to name just a few. Amongst them, these scents embody a spirit that seeks out the weirder odours and isn’t afraid of perfume that is challenging, confrontational and darkly beautiful.

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Scent a Celebrity Series: Scent Up Your Life! Scenting The Spice Girls

Scent Up Your Life!

Scent Up Your Life!

The Scent a Celebrity Series is my vain attempt at picking perfumes for those who don’t know any better, yes I mean celebrities. Let’s face it, most celebrities are incapable of choosing decent clothing/boyfriends/girlfriends/movies/insert-celebrity-mistake-here let alone having the ability to make decisions about something as important as their scent – that’s where I come in. Never fear my dear schlebs, I will ensure that you are appropriately scented, all you need to do is listen.

I am a child of the ’90s and I am not ashamed. Yes fashion-wise it was probably one of the worst decades but musically it was pretty ace, for it was the ’90s that bought us Brit Pop, Rave music and most importantly – The Spice Girls. Ginger, Baby, Sporty, Scary and Posh may have long gone their separate ways but I (and many other ’90s kids I’m sure) still hold a soft spot for these persistant purveyors of ‘Girl Power’.

To celebrate the world’s very best girl band I offer up a scented tribute of perfume selections that showcase the ‘zig-a-zag-ah’ that gave the Spice Girls their power. Mad, bad, ridiculous and brilliantly feminine these perfumes invite you to ‘Scent up your life’ and live just like the coolest thing to come out of the ’90s since MC Hammer and his Harem Pants.

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Scent a Celebrity Series: Spritzing Springfield – Scenting The Simpsons Part 2

Springfield Residents

The colourful residents of Springfield

The Scent a Celebrity Series is my vain attempt at picking perfumes for those who don’t know any better, yes I mean celebrities. Let’s face it, most celebrities are incapable of choosing decent clothing/boyfriends/girlfriends/movies/insert-celebrity-mistake-here let alone having the ability to make decisions about something as important as their scent – that’s where I come in. Never fear my dear schlebs, I will ensure that you are appropriately scented, all you need to do is listen.

In previous instalments I have successfully scented a wide range of celebrities and characters ranging from the loveable lunatics that are The Muppets to the hip schizo-rapper Nicki Minaj as well as Icelandic Siren Björk and super-glam glam-poppers Scissor Sisters, even The Royal Family haven’t been able to escape my scented clutches.

I have mentioned before that I am a hardcore fan of The Simpsons, I watch it nearly every day (it’s always on when I get home from work) and I confess to having seen every episode, perhaps more than once! The inhabitants of Springfield are a fascinating bunch and over the course of both parts of Spritzing Springfield I hope to select fragrances that befit their eccentricities and play to their incredibly human characteristics.

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Scent a Celebrity Series: Spritzing Springfield – Scenting The Simpsons Part 1

The Simpsons

The Simpsons – The world’s favourite family.

The Scent a Celebrity Series is my vain attempt at picking perfumes for those who don’t know any better, yes I mean celebrities. Let’s face it, most celebrities are incapable of choosing decent clothing/boyfriends/girlfriends/movies/insert-celebrity-mistake-here let alone having the ability to make decisions about something as important as their scent – that’s where I come in. Never fear my dear schlebs, I will ensure that you are appropriately scented, all you need to do is listen.

So far the series has touched upon a variety of famous names including; those fuzzy-wuzzy comics The Muppets, the Icelandic super-talent that is Björk, schizophrenic female (but kinda-male due to her alter ego) rapper Nicki Minaj, the maniacal monarchs that make up the Royal Family and super-glam pop tour de force Scissor Sisters. Joining this patchwork quilt of celebrities is everyone’s favourite dysfunctional TV family, The Simpsons.

I am a die-hard The Simpsons Fan and I confess to having seen nearly every single episode at least twice. The colourful inhabitants of Springfield, or predominately-yellow inhabitants should I say, each provide a large dash of humour to a town that you wouldn’t really want to live in but are quite happy to watch from the comfort and relative safety of your own sofa.

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Scent a Celebrity Series: Filthy/Gorgeous Fumes – Scenting Scissor Sisters

Scissor Sisters

“I’m a classy honey kissy huggy lovey dovey ghetto princess”

The Scent a Celebrity Series is my vain attempt at picking perfumes for those who don’t know any better, yes I mean celebrities. Let’s face it, most celebrities are incapable of choosing decent clothing/boyfriends/girlfriends/movies/insert-celebrity-mistake-here let alone having the ability to make decisions about something as important as their scent – that’s where I come in. Never fear my dear schlebs, I will ensure that you are appropriately scented, all you need to do is listen.

So far the series has touched upon a variety of famous names including; those fuzzy-wuzzy comics The Muppets, the Icelandic super-talent that is Björk and schizophrenic female (but kinda-male due to her alter ego) rapper Nicki Minaj. Joining this plethora of huge talents, and even bigger egos is the wonderfully glam and delightfully eccentric band of personalities that is Scissor Sisters.

Scissor Sisters, currently consisting of Jake Shears, Ana Matronic, Del Marquis, Babydaddy and one other dude (but he doesn’t appear much so we shall forget about him), are a glam rock band taking their cues from Elton John, Abba, Blondie and the Bee Gees just to name a few. To say that they are a band with personality is an understatement, in fact they are a band with four distinct personalities, each one being as eccentric, if not more so than the other.

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