Bad Brad – Five Reasons Why Chanel’s New Nº5 Advert is Naff

Yesterday Chanel released the brand new and much-anticipated Nº5 ad starring Brad Pitt and if you haven’t seen it already, where have you been? It’s everywhere! One cannot load up Facebook, Twitter or YouTube without being bombarded by Brad in his beardy glory.

When the news that Chanel had picked Brad Pitt as the new face of Nº5 broke the whole world (OK maybe just us fumenerds) pretty much thought “Good move Chanel, good move”. I mean, what could be more refreshing than a male face on one of the most iconic feminine fragrances of all time? It had the potential to be a truly terrific advert, especially when considering just how grand and over the top Chanel’s past offerings had been, but alas it was not to be and the result is really rather flat.

I’m not trying to be a Negative Nancy here, and kudos to Chanel for attempting something completely different, but really, this is the best they could do? I honestly thought it was a joke the first time I watched it, or at least a teaser trailer, but no, it’s the real thing.

They managed to snag one of the most iconic actors of our time (I’d have preferred Clooney but that’s just a matter of preference) and this is what they came up with?! Has Karl finally lost it? They seem to have forgotten that they are Chanel and they can do anything!

So, in light of the disappointment that is Brad Pitt for Chanel I present to you; Five Reasons Why Chanel’s New Nº5 Advert is Naff…

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You Shall Go to the Ball – Christian Dior Grand Bal Perfume Review

I try to be mad at Dior I really do, I mean they have shamelessly reformulated a number of their modern classics (namely Dior Homme, Pure Poison and Hypnotic Poison) and whilst the newer versions still capture the essence of the original, it feels as if a small part of their spirit has been lost forever, like a butterfly who has been touched by human hands, beautiful still but irrevocably damaged.

So yes, I try to be mad at Dior, but I really can’t. “Why’s that?” I hear you ask, well I can sum the reason up in three short french words; La Collection Privée. That’s right, the problem is that the recent few releases from Dior’s La Collection Privée, along with a good few others in the collection (Eau Noire anyone?), are so good that I simply cannot stay mad, just like when Nigel makes me laugh when I’m attempting to be grumpy at him. I may be smiling at you Dior, but I’m still mad, somewhere deep down.

Grand Bal is the latest addition to La Collection Privée and as you have probably guessed from the introductory paragraphs in this post, it is another good’un. Taking inspiration from “Christian Dior’s great ball gowns, whose full skirts and beauty evoked the petals of a flower in full bloom” Grand Bal is a big, beautiful and buxom jasmine that accurately “embodies the intoxication of a summer’s night at the first light of dawn”. I was destined to like this wasn’t I?

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Mr. Butterworth & Mr. Ford – Tom Ford For Men, Oud Wood and Grey Vetiver Perfume Reviews

Mr. Butterworth, my rather lovely partner-in-crime and Mr. Ford, the dashing designer behind Tom Ford go hand-in-hand. Well, not literally of course. I know that you know that I’d never allow that kind of shenanigans! What I mean is that, whilst not being a fumenerd like you are I, Mr. Butterworth does have a certain penchant for fragrances bearing Mr. Ford’s name.

If you were to take a peek into mine and Mr. Butterworth’s bathroom you would find a big collection of perfumes and although we share a lot of scents there is most definitely a ‘his ‘n’ hers’ thing going on. So if you look hard enough you will see a small contingent of masculine fragrances that belong solely to the Butterworth (although I do occasionally raid his stash), and three of his favourites are by Tom Ford.

Tom Ford currently has four masculine fragrances and about a million unisex private blends to choose from. Mr. Butterworth, with his ever-discerning taste, has found love for Tom Ford for Men, Oud Wood and Grey Vetiver, you could say that he’s a little bit obsessed. Should I be worried? Let’s just say that I will be keeping a close eye on him next time we’re near the Tom Ford counter

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YSL’s New Declaration – Yves Saint Laurent Manifesto Perfume Review

Jessica Chastain looks good in EVERYTHING, even purple paint... — Jessica Chastain looks good in EVERYTHING, even purple paint…

The stand-alone feminine fragrance is the bread and butter of the designer fragrance world. I personally find it fascinating to see what the big three houses (Chanel, Dior and YSL) will do with their next feminine pillar, as with each release one sees the change in times and tastes, and it seems that change is definitely afoot at YSL. Having recently, under the direction of Hedi Slimane, dropped the “Yves” to become simply “Saint Laurent Paris” the fashion side of the brand looks to move in a new direction and the fragrances may just follow suit.

When I think of YSL (the perfumes will still be marketed under the old name) I think of bold, fearless perfumes such as Opium, Rive Gauche, Paris and Kouros. Yes these fragrances embody the styles of their respective eras but they’ve always seemed, to me at least, to capture the spirit of Yves Saint Laurent the man and the renegade designer perfectly. Recent efforts by the brand however, have failed to live up to the legacy of the classics.

Manifesto, created by perfumes Flipo and Doc Long, is YSL’s first major feminine release since Parisienne in 2009 and whilst that wasn’t exactly a tough act to follow it feels like the pressure is on for YSL to bring out something new and daring. Well, it appears that YSL have sensed this pressure, describing Manifesto as “an attitude, a burst of laughter, a tone of voice, a presence” [1] and “the manifesto of femininity” [2]. Is it really as daring as it seems?

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The Candy Perfume Boy’s Gaga Giveaway

Following yesterday’s review of Lady Gaga’s debut fragrance Fame I thought I would continue the Gaga theme and appeal to everyone’s inner little monster by offering a giveaway.

As a thank you for pre-ordering Fame, The Perfume Shop sent me some Lady Gaga swag, namely; a veil, some Gaga tattoos and two sets of Fame bottle-esque acrylic nails. Now I have mentioned before that I may like to smell like a hooker on the odd occasion but I draw the line at looking like one, so I thought I would pass my Bag O’ Gaga Swag on to one lucky winner. I’ll even throw in a 2.5ml spray sample of fame because I’m nice/evil like that (it depends on what you think of Fame).

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The Black Soul of Celebrity Fragrances – Lady Gaga Fame Perfume Review

Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta, or Lady Gaga as she is more commonly known, is undeniably one of the more interesting pop stars around today. Forget Britney, Christina, Miley and all those other pretenders, Gaga is a true visionary and a real star. Oozing with talent and more than her fair share of batshit-craziness, Gaga is like the rebellious love child spawned from the spliced DNA of David Bowie and Madonna.

OK you get it, I’m a fan and whilst I refuse to class myself as a ‘little monster’ I must admit that I was genuinely excited about Fame, I mean if anyone was going to do an interesting fragrance then it would be Gaga.

Apparently cooked up in a laboratory deep within the bowels of the Haus of Gaga (Lady Gaga’s fashion collective) Fame is described as an “opulent, crushed floral” [1] that, with it’s black coloured juice that is invisible once air born, represents the black soul of fame. Crazy huh? – Not really because Fame is all style and no substance…

Fame had the makings of a truly great celebrity fragrance; great bottle? Yep! massive gimick (the black liquid)? Yep again! and amazing ad campaign? Hell to the yep! But the one area that Fame disappoints is most definitely the most crucial, that’s right folks I’m talking about the smell and as much as it pains me to say it one cannot hide the fact that in terms of scent, Fame is a complete dud.

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Universal Water – Maison Francis Kurkdjian Aqua Universalis Perfume Review

Last week, after six weeks of painful but also enjoyable unemployment, I started a brand new, and very exciting job (hence the lack of posts). Now like any sane fume-nerd my initial though on gaining new employment was “what perfume am I going to wear on my first day?!” That’s right, not “will I like the job?” or even “what shall I wear”, it was, as it always is, all about the perfume.

So why not just where whatever I fancy on day one? Well the thing is, when entering a new environment it is important for one to ease people in gently, it does not pay to projectile vomit ones personality in people’s general direction. I have found that it’s always best to go for something relatively low key that is still perfume-y enough to let people know that you mean business, and what do you know a few days before my first day just the thing landed on my doorstep – Aqua Universalis by Maison Francis Kurkdjian.

If you’re not familiar with the idea behind über talented perfumer Francis Kurkdjian’s solo project then you should get to familiarising yourself pretty quick because you’re missing out. The house provides an ‘all for one’ fragrant shopping experience with fragrances for the morning and evening, and wonderful scented things for the body (leather bracelets et al) and the home (candles, incense papers, laundry detergents and scented bubbles). With his ‘Maison’ Kurkdjian is selling a completely scented lifestyle like no other.

Aqua Universalis is Kurkdjian’s take on the much maligned genre of laundry clean fragrances. Made to fulfil the average consumer’s desire to feel clean and shower fresh, a style of fragrance that very often ends up producing cocktails of vile, strong musks and calone that sends fumenerds heading for the hills. Aqua Universalis is not one of these fragrances, it is an intelligent and natural take on ‘clean’ that most importantly still smells like a perfume.

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Postcards From My Collection Part 3: L’Artisan Parfumeur, Penhaligon’s and Some Dude Named Bertrand Duchaufour

The aim of the Postcards From Collection series is to take you on a guided tour through the weird, and sometimes wonderful bunch of glass, plastic and smelly water that is my perfume collection. I see it as a way to give you full disclosure on exactly which bottles I deem worthy enough to grace my bathroom shelf (I know, not the ideal storage place) and perhaps give you an insight into my scented history.

In Part 1 we looked at the most precious things in my collection, those that are both big & small, and in Part 2 we took a trip to my favourite holiday destination – Planet Mugler. On both occasions I have shown you some of my absolute favourite things and as the series moves on we will hopefully have covered everything I own, we may even delve into the purgatory drawer (maybe).

This week we are having a mosey around two brands linked together by one special guy – some dude called Bertrand Duchaufour. I don’t know if you’ve heard of him (just kidding, I know you have), he’s this amazing perfumer who does a lot of spectacular things for the two brands we shall be investigating today; L’Artisan Parfumeur and Penhaligon’s.

So sit back and relax as we cruise through Havana, sit under a tree with a black-clad lothario in Seville, cross the Bosphorus chewing on Turkish Delight, go to the circus and chat up a filthy milkmaid in the English countryside…

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“Perfume Sets the Mood…and I am In the Mood For Glamour” – Dita Von Teese Eau de Parfum Perfume Review

I have a list in my head of celebrities that I think should release a fragrance. I know that I really shouldn’t be encouraging the stars to explore the world of perfume, after all the majority of their fragrant output is utterly dreadful, but I do believe that there are a good few schlebs out there who would invest enough time and artistic integrity to make an exceptional fragrance.

One such celebrity sitting on my mental celebrity fragrance list was Dita Von Teese (along with others such as Björk and Kate Bush FYI) and it seems that she may have read my mind having decided to take the plunge into the world of celebrity perfume. As expected the result is a perfume that perfectly captures the style and personality of the celebrity for which it represents.

Dita Von Teese Eau de Parfum officially launched in 2011 but we didn’t see it in the UK until May 2012. It is described as a “timeless” perfume and it very much draws on the old school glamorous florals of the past, specifically those of brands such as Houbigant and Caron. Dita is reputed to have been very involved with the creation of her Eau de Parfum and for an entire year spent almost every day working with perfumer Nathalie Lorson in the lab.

“I wanted it to be a perfume that smelled exactly how I imagined it. A scent needs to reflect all the different facets of my personality. It had to be elegant, glamorous, sophisticated, sexy, dark and mysterious.”

Dita Von Teese

Written inside the perfume’s box is a quote from Dita that reads; “Perfume sets the mood…and I am in the mood for glamour.” and that very much sets the tone for a scent chock full of glamour, style and classic beauty. With Dita Von Teese Eau de Parfum, the world’s favourite burlesque star presents a perfume that the “femme totale”, a woman in full form.

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A Public Information Film From Penhaligon’s of London: A Lady’s Guide to Wearing Peoneve

I know that I have perhaps been a little bit video-happy over the last week, what with videos from CB I Hate Perfume and Thierry Mugler, but I simply couldn’t not share this fabulous and very amusing public information film from British brand Penhaligon’s

Entitled “A Lady’s Guide to Wearing Peoneve” the film details (with a stiff upper lip and lots of British wit) when a lady should, or should not apply Penhaligon’s brand new feminine fragrance Peoneve.

Enjoy!

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